Naked Man
November 23, 2009
by Carter Schoffer
Naked man in the change room, I applaud you for your unabashed body comfort. I support and encourage your dedication to hygiene. I tip my hat to your daily routine of staying informed by newsprint. And I appreciate your efforts to preserve the custom you grew up with of being kind and courteous to your fellow man.
But naked man in the change room, I’m not comfortable with your body. I don’t appreciate you using the hair dryer for anything but your head. I’m not for you using the leg up on the counter toweling technique. I don’t agree with lounging naked in the locker room while perusing stock quotes and world events. And by god my good man, the kindest courtesy you could afford me is to put some pants on before any pleasantries are exchanged.
Naked man, get clean, get dressed and get on your way.
Originally posted at precisionnutrition.com
Gym Etiquette
November 17, 2009
by Carter Schoffer
There are a number of things that drive me crazy about commercial gyms, not the least of which is that after that dotted line is signed, members are left on their own. And amongst many others problems that this lack of start-up direction fosters, a good many new sign-ups ultimately end up developing some very bad habits.
In effort to remedy this, I wholeheartedly believe that gyms should come with a start-up manual.
So without further ado, Chapter 1: Gym Etiquette -
Wipe your sweat off: This one should go without saying. Leaving a trail of bodily fluids is not cool. No one should fault you for sweating but you are culpable if you fail to wipe your sweat off benches, mats and other equipment you use.
Wear clean shoes: If, you haven’t opted for gym-specific shoes, at the very least ensure that your work boots, Mr. YMCA, are not tracking filth around the place. No matter how “hardcore” your gym may be, no one likes to squat in mud.
Remove weight from bars: This is a matter of courtesy on a number of levels. Going all the way back to daycare, a given in proper decorum is that if you take something out, be sure to return it when you’re done with it. It’s a universal act that doesn’t stop at the gym doors. Cleaning up after yourself aside, there are a couple other important reasons for ensuring that you take your weights off and return them to their appropriate rack(s).
- Not everyone can safely handle the heavier weight plates.
- Not removing weights is a universal signal that someone is using that particular bar, rack, piece of equipment or machine. If you leave your weight on the bar out of laziness, misguided bravado or sheer ignorance and not because you’re coming right back to it, you’re negatively impacting others. They won’t know whether the particular item is spoken for and thus their workouts will be impeded.
And please note that stripping a bar or machine down to a single plate is not the same thing as removing all of your weight. This should seem logical without chiding but, for whatever reason, a common habit is for trainees to stop removing weights once they get down to a single plate per side. Spend the extra moment and clear the bar entirely.
Return dumbbells (DB) to their appropriate location: Another seemingly obvious act of courtesy, returning DBs to their specific place on the DB rack, should be a given. Unfortunately, it isn’t. In an empty gym with clearly marked DBs this might not be such an important act but it’s crucial in a busy gym or one with poorly marked poundage.
When you’re at home looking for a tea mug, where do you look? The cupboard or shelf designated for tea mugs, of course. Now let’s say someone comes over and instead of putting your mugs on that shelf, they stow them under the sink, behind the bleach. Not exactly the first place you’re going to look and it’ll take your time, effort and a great degree of your patience to find them. It’s the same thing with dumbbells at the gym. And it’s really simple -
First Step: Return DBs from the bench or area where you’re using them to the rack.
Second Step: Place DBs in their designated slot, if applicable.
Don’t see the importance of the second step? Well, let’s say I’ve just finished using the 150lb DBs and in the process of attempting to return them to their proper spot, I find that someone has instead placed 10lb DBs there. I now either have to return ignorant favour by carrying the 150 pounders down to the open 10lb slots at the other end of the rack, getting in the way of others as I do so, and contribute to woes of others. Or I need to set the 150lb DBs down, take the 10lb DBs from the 150lb slots, return them to their proper place and go back to hoist the 150lb DBs into their slots. All of that because the person before me was too lazy to put their DBs back to where they got them.
That was tiring enough to write let alone execute. So put your DBs back to where they belong.
Let others work in: Whenever possible, as a conscientious member of your gym, it’s proper to let others work in. If unfamiliar with the phrase, it means allowing others to use the piece of equipment you’re using during your rest periods. In some cases this might not be ideal but so long as the impediment on your workout isn’t severe, it’s a nice thing to do. Moreover, you’ll likely need the act reciprocated some time in the future.
The key to letting others work in is dialogue. Go beyond the head nod and grunt combination and use the more developed regions of your brain. Explain how many sets you have, your rest periods and any other applicable info. It’ll take less than a minute and the other person will know how to best conduct themselves so as not to be an impediment.
You might not be able to stick precisely to your rest periods but this slight inconvenience is more than offset by the act of courtesy.
Don’t curl in the squat rack: A pet peeve of many a seasoned lifter, curling in the squat rack, is a weightlifting taboo that has fallen through the cracks as fitness centres have taken over. It’s a matter of courtesy because you simply don’t need the rack in order to curl. You can just as effectively take the bar to a corner and curl there. By opting to stay in the rack, you’re preventing others from performing exercises that actually require it (squats, for example)
If the gym isn’t busy or if there are a number of available squat racks, it isn’t as big of a deal (supply will meet demand). If, however, the gym is busy or there are a limited number of squat racks, gym etiquette dictates that you move the bar out of the rack and curl elsewhere.
Note: This act of courtesy doesn’t just apply to barbell curls – they’re just the most common offender. It expands to cover all exercises that don’t require a rack.
Lend a spot when comfortable: There are two parts to that statement. The first is providing a spot to a trainee in need. The second is the condition that you should only do so if comfortable. That is, you should only provide a spot if you know what you’re doing and feel as though you’re adding to the safety of the trainee in need.
Spotting is an art that requires practice. Sounds a bit silly to state but it’s not nearly as straightforward as taking on some of the load if a trainee gets into trouble. An experienced spotter can judge when a lifter will need help and will be able to provide just enough assistance to keep the bar moving through its correct range of motion. Additionally, a well rehearsed spotter is like a golfer’s caddy in that they help with judgment (how much weight to use, critique of form, encourage additional reps, etc).
In some cases, you may be a very experienced spotter and yet it’s still not appropriate to accept a spot request. Specifically, if a trainee is lifting recklessly (far too much weight on the bar, for example), it’s generally not a good idea to help facilitate their foolish act – they can get hurt and so can you. Similarly, even if their execution is perfect and the load is within their ability, it doesn’t necessarily mean that the load is within your spotting ability. If you accept the spot request and the trainee gets into trouble, you better be able to help them.
Once again, communication reigns supreme. If recklessness is the case, explain that you’re uncomfortable lending a hand because it doesn’t appear to be the safe thing to do. Some people will listen to your concerns while others will carry on imprudently. It’s not your place to convince them but explaining why you think it’s unsafe may end up preventing an injury or worse. Similarly, if a trainee is lifting a load beyond your personal spotting comfort level, explain this to them.
Finally, it’s important to keep your wits about you while on the gym floor. Very much like defensive driving, your safety and the safety of those around you will be greatly benefited by a constant and keen level of awareness.
Don’t drop weights: This has very little to do with making noise and very much to do with not breaking/bending equipment. If you drop a DB and it isn’t perfectly flush when it strikes the ground, it’ll bend, or at the very least, loosen. DBs are expensive and gyms are slow to replace them, so even though they’re not exactly delicate, it’s important not to throw them around – the heavier they get, the more important this is. The same is true of barbells. If you drop a barbell and it doesn’t hit the ground flush, the bar will bend and in some cases, snap. This is dangerous and, like with the DBs, a problem if you plan on working out there for awhile.
Clearly there are times when you have to bail on a movement to prevent injury. This is very different from tossing the weight around out of bravado, lack of effort or ignorance. If, you need to drop a weight to prevent injury or because you “missed” during an Olympic lifting effort, save your body and bail on the bar or DBs.
Note: Sometimes it is about noise. Specifically, if you train at a fitness centre and not a weight room or “hardcore” gym, if you make too much noise performing an exercise (deadlifting, for example), the gym management will not only threaten your membership, there’s a good chance they’ll ban the particular movement. So don’t ruin it for everyone by dropping weights.
Don’t interrupt during a set: No one likes to be interrupted while they’re performing a task and when heavy weights are inserted into the scenario, it can go beyond dislike to danger. If you require access to a particular piece of equipment, have a question to ask or have some other need of the trainee or their training space, wait until they’re finished with their set.
Talking to the trainee, getting too close, standing in their direct sight-line, taking weight off their bench or rack, crossing in front or behind and all other invasions of space, can dramatically impact concentration and, in turn, coordination. So remember that the safe and correct actions are to bide your time well away from the lifter, grab the equipment from elsewhere or take an alternate route.
Be Respectful: I submit that it’s well within your right to form personal appraisals of others. Right or wrong, correct or ignorant, everyone is adorned with the freedom of thought. What isn’t cool is openly making disparaging comments about others. You’re going to see all degrees of oddity at the gym and you’re going to find yourself routinely thinking “Wow!” What’s crucial is that you remember to be considerate. Don’t gawk, point, laugh or ridicule. (I know these sound like givens but, from my experience, they’re worth reinforcing)
For many individuals, the gym is an uncomfortable place to begin with. They feel out of place and it takes all their nerve just to show up. A single instance of belittlement because they appear out of sorts can crush all of their gym-going confidence. This doesn’t mean that they aren’t doing something foolish, and neither does it negate the fact that they may very well be just plain strange. What it does mean is that it’s proper manner to keep these appraisals to yourself and respect the fact that so long as they’ve paid their dues and aren’t offending others, they have as much right to be there as you do.
Relatedly, read this post as it relates to the comfort of the opposite sex.
Originally posted at precisionnutrition.com
Sharks in the Water
November 18, 2009
by Carter Schoffer
Why am I paying full price for a club that I can only use half of?
Isn’t having a womens section akin to reverse sexism? No, never mind the reverse part, it is segregative gender-based discrimination! Someone call a lawyer, my rights are being violated!
If women have their own side and the panty-waist men have taken over the main area, where can I lift real weights?
You want to know of a sure way to tell whether a girl is easy? She’s easy if she works out in the main area. Think about it, if she performs her workout in the main area and not the women’s area it’s because she wants attention and definitely gets down.
The above collection of claims, observations, protestations and politically incorrect suppositions are but just a few quips I’ve overheard (and a couple I’ve even thought) in my time attending facilities with women’s only areas.
It’s no wonder she isn’t making any real body comp changes, all she does is cardio.
You don’t lift weights, sweetie. You play with pink trinkets.
Why are women afraid to lift real weight?
Why are women afraid of performing real exercises? They spend all their time standing on a bosu ball performing 30 rep dumbbell biceps curls.
Have you seen what they have in the women’s area? They seriously have pink dumbbells, a couple yoga mats, a smith machine and 300 cardio contraptions.
These, like the first set of remarks are the tip of the iceberg of similarly themed commentary coming out of the mouths of male gym goers and internet keyboard jockeys. And like the first set, I find myself in partial agreement. After all, while the genders certainly have special needs, hard work and effective exercises are commonalities. Commonalities that theoretically would lead one to posit that one large well equipped space should accommodate both genders without the need for special treatment.
Unfortunately, this isn’t the case. Why? Because there are sharks in the water. And I’m not talking about any old shark, I’m talking about Great Whites. Friggin’ predators.
Fellas, seriously, by and large women go to the gym to workout. They might go to socialize or to feel better about themselves, but they don’t go to get picked up — main area or otherwise. It’s hard to grasp, I know, but lululemon pants aren’t the international sign for stare at her ass and opine on the merits of feeling the pump. And as hard as it is to believe, the squat isn’t an in — you lame, unoriginal Carcharodon carcharias.
So, now after being told this, is it any surprise that women avoid exercises that risk exposure to your suggestions? Or a shock that they aim to avoid you whenever possible?
I know, I know you’re just trying to be the nice guy and offer advice, right? Well, my man, the last time I checked, women do stop and ask for directions. If she needs help, she’ll ask. But be aware that she probably won’t ask you. Why? Because you’re wearing a smeedium sized ‘beater and grunting like a fool while staring at her ass, that’s why!
So please fellas, resist your carnal delusions and let the women of this world workout in peace. Maybe then they won’t feel so overwhelmed that a separate section is required. Maybe then they’ll be able to workout confidently & comfortably with proper equipment and effective exercises.
